An open letter to all parents from a non-parent.

I came across this blog article via Facebook and I just had to share it. It reminded me of how I felt when we came home from the hospital. It was literally, right, we’re home, now what? It took us about half an hour to decide whether to leave her at home with my mum or to take her with us to the supermarket. Simple decisions took on a whole new complexity! I have to say though, it wasn’t quite as bad as painted in this article, but I do think you lose a little bit of your brain with each placenta 😉

trying to be good

I just finished babysitting your baby today.

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I have salmon stuck on my neck and in the crease under my left breast.

My eardrum is damaged due to high frequency screaming.

I had to hold her while I was peeing because from her perspective it seemed like Satan himself would rape and kill her slowly if I put her down thus I did not get the chance to wipe myself properly…

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…no matter though as I am covered in a thick layer of sweat from pushing the stroller up the hill so a bit more wet between the legs even things out.

I washed my hair this morning but all of a sudden it looks like a stringy bag of shit pile.

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I haven’t had a chance to eat anything except snatching a few cold peas from her snack pack and my head is pounding.

I watched her draw on…

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