Day 3 of the blogging marathon and I nearly forgot to post! How pathetic am I *lol*
Today has been another good day. I feel so much better just having made a decision about what to do in September. I’ve registered with three supply teaching/tutoring sites now and I feel more positive about things. I talked with mum today on Skype. She was talking about coming over for a few months to spend time with the kids and help me out with childminding, but I think the best way she can help is by contributing to Catherine’s school fees if necessary and she was happy to do that. It felt good to properly talk to her.
I have found it so hard to talk to people about how I feel, which is why things started to come out in my status updates last year. It was as though the balloon was full but rather than bursting it started to leak. Expressing myself in little bites was easier than looking someone in the face. It’s been widely recognised that online communications have changed how we interact with each other. Relationships that would normally take months or years to develop face-to-face collapse into a matter of weeks. People can create an online persona that is entirely false, or they can reveal their true selves to perfect strangers without fearing (or thinking of) the consequences. There are obvious pitfalls in online communities but for me the benefits have far outweighed the cost. Leaking little bits at first allowed me to test the water and find a great deal of warmth and support, which strengthened me to take the steps necessary to get better. I’m sure I’ve not seen the last of the darkness, but the light isn’t so tiny any more.
So, thank you to my online and real life communities! I hope others are fortunate to experience such benefits as I have.
With love xxx